Everyone is insecure about something and it doesn’t necessarily have to be about your physical appearance. It can also come down to experiences of how others made you feel or comparing yourself in all aspects to others, even how you see and talk to yourself. Insecurities has been glamourised so much that it is deemed to be almost romantic if a guy/girl is obsessive over their significant other or even territorial. It has been drilled into us from young just by simple behaviour not knowing it’s damaging us in the long run.
Young girls: if a boy seems to give you attention in an aggressive way, bothers you, or even “jokingly” hurts you (play fights), it doesn’t necessarily mean he likes you. Chances are he doesn’t quite know how to express his feelings the right way or he’s afraid of rejection. Boys are not emotional beings like us females but more logical. If I were you, I’d look at it as a red flag if a boy is comfortable putting his hands on you “as a joke” as a way to express his feelings for you. Like I said, boys are logical so I look at it as a way to see how much pain you can put up with as a guide to know how they should deal with you. A boy should NEVER feel comfortable putting his hands on you, not even as a joke. So my young ones, don’t mistaken mean, aggressive behaviour for feelings.
Ladies & Men: Insecure behaviour is being obsessive, tracking your every move and who you’re with, telling you what you can and cannot do, making you feel like you’re owned by them, making you choose between them and others. Body language plays a huge role in any form of relationship and in fact it shows you a lot about a person. One example of an insecure body language is eye contact, avoidance of eye contact is a big red flag! Your eyes expresses your inner world. Doubting your love is a form of insecurity, comparing themselves with others, accusations, manipulative behaviour and the list goes on.
Social media: it’s not always about relationships, the media plays its part in making people feel insecure by portraying a life that you “should” be living such as all females should be a “Instagram babe”, have a sugar daddy, using nothing but “pretty privileges” to get through life and making some girls out there feel like they’re not pretty enough to have such privileges to use or all men should go gym and become muscular or have a nice car, live alone and be making x amount of money. No one shows their struggles online or how hard they had to work to get to where they are in their lives and it doesn’t help when successful people are not honest about how they reached their goal but instead they mislead others by selling them a lie of what they should do to live such life.
Physical appearance: Another big topic especially for women who are insecure about their bodies and turn to surgery. Also men who aren’t muscular and feel pressured to over do gym and consume products to help build them.
It is important to recognise your insecurities and have desires to fix them before getting involved with others and I’m not just talking romantically but it can be friendships & family too. It’s highly draining and can be toxic. If you’re dealing with someone who is insecure, reassurance goes a long way even by the littlest things. Lack of reassurance can equal to lack of communication which leaves room for assumptions and that’s how the insecurity starts.
It’s so important to be so secure in yourself, it shows from the inside and out.
Be mindful, be kind ❤️